i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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