I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Randomize
