doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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