I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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