Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I think I just shit out all my problems.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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