cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
