i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
