walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
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