who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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