Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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