the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
