I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
It's shark week go big or go home
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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