She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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