Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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