Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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