Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
