so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
He passed out mid-signature
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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