no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Randomize
