I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
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