distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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