marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i want to swaddle you in tequila
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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