we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
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