Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
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