Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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