Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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