I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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