everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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