I wanna passion pit in your ass
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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