arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
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