Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
