yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I will pee on everything he values.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
