everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize