yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
We talked him into tasing himself.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Randomize
