Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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