Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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