windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
