try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Randomize
