i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
