let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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