So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Randomize
