Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize