We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Randomize
