My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I'm always down for nudity.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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