I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Enjoy the penises
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
