Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
