I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
