She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Randomize