i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
