Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
