Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
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Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
