were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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