I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Still dying that you shit outside
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
